Do you ever go through times of re-learning things you have already learned, or should I say things you thought you learned, or things you learned in your head but not in your heart? I’m having a week like that.
I have really been struggling with where I am, in all my places. Discontent, disillusioned, and disquieted. I want to be better, to do better, to have better, to change, to impact more, to matter more. It’s a place I have been before and a place I am sure I will visit again, for every time I go there I learn something anew. I have learned lessons about trust in this place. Lessons about hope in this place. Lessons about perseverance in this place. I learn one lesson over and over again in this place: the lesson of acceptance.
It seems that right when I am at the height of my discontentedness God starts bringing into my peripheral stories of people who did big things. Like Noah or Esther. Those people who were called and used by God to alter human history, to really leave their mark, and I want that. It’s just human nature. I mean which of us doesn’t want to be known like a Carrie Underwood, Ann Voskamp, or Beth Moore? What Christian doesn’t daydream of being a faith champion like Tim Tebow, Kirk Cameron, or Billy Graham? We all want to create a stir, to leave behind a legacy, to be the change the world needs in a very public way.
As someone who believes we are all created to be and do something important and unique, (Ephesians 2:10), I get caught up in figuring out what my contribution will be. What is it I am called to do for the Kingdom? As I primp and preen and await my cue to enter stage left for my debut to the world, I get a copy of the script. Where none of the lines are mine. Where all the names are listed under Supporting Cast, except His.
God reminds me that He has called me to be invisible.
Dear friends please put down the phone and tuck away your trusty list of Christian cliches to leave in the comment section. I don’t mean that statement in any sort of self-deprecating way. I am called to be invisible and I am learning again to be accepting of that.
I think that one of those lies we are led to believe is that if we aren’t sought after then we are not enough. It is true that we all know that it is God doing the things, but we would stand in casting lines for hours to be the hand models. We all want to be seen.
We forget that being invisible doesn’t mean we stop being.
Public speakers would not have the confidence to say one word without the encouragement and prayer of their silent partners. Folks facing persecution for their beliefs would not have the courage required without the safe places to call home; the support systems no one sees because they are behind closed doors. Individuals leading the charge against the status quo would become exhausted without their friends and supporters on the front lines holding up their arms.
Being called to be invisible is a high calling because it goes against everything we want. It goes against the striving-attaining-perfecting mindset of our culture wherein we measure our success by how many people can put our name and face together.
So many of us with invisible assignments are stuck in a holding pattern unsure that we have received the right marching orders.
Sometimes you know what you’re supposed to do and you don’t want to. (See: Jonah) Sometimes you know what you’re supposed to do, are willing to do it even, but you know that the actual doing of it is going to totally suck. (See: Jesus). Sometimes you are already doing what you are called to do but you doubt. (See: Humanity).
There isn’t a cheer squad for the cheerleaders. We use applause to gauge our performance and endorsements to determine our worth. Those things don’t often come to the invisible. More readily enter doubts. Little voices that compare and contrast and the invisible are never on top. The invisible must be cloaked in humility and tuned into Heaven sent feedback.
I think everyone called to be invisible wants to be seen sometimes. Likewise, everyone called to a public pursuit wants to be invisible sometimes. The Enemy will use that to keep us all from doing, to keep us searching and looking instead of being what we are created to be.
To shine the spotlight on Him and not on ourselves- the occupation He calls us all to.
Whether you feel invisible today, or are searching for an invisibility cloak, take some time to shine the light on the right Main Man, to give praise where praise is due, and step out in your role knowing that as we do the Audience of One sees and that’s all the adoration we need.